A Bounty-ful Birthday

Today is my birthday.  I’ve been in a bad mood for a couple weeks, and have decided that for my birthday, I will give myself the means to cure it.  That’s what this is.

I am, as of this moment, putting a bounty on Scott Walker’s governorship.  Anybody who can demonstrate that they are the proximal cause of Scott Walker resigning as governor of Wisconsin will receive a bounty of not less than $1,000.  That’s what I’m putting into the pot, though if other people are willing to contribute, I will organize it and post the updated totals.

If you offer Scott Walker a job that is so good, he resigns to take it, I will give you $1,000.

If you dig up a scandal so egregious that Scott Walker resigns in shame, I will give you $1,000 (and mad props, because I can’t imagine what would actually shame him into resigning)

If you do something illegal that causes Scott Walker to resign, I will first consult a lawyer, then if I’m told it won’t get me sent to jail, I will give you $1,000.

I am not soliciting anything illegal.  If your plot for getting Walker to resign requires illegal action and you go through with it, that is up to you and done on your own responsibility.

I’m also willing to pay out the bounty in goods of equal value if, for some reason, you’d prefer that.

This is not a joke.  I am dead serious.  If you want to help, or have an idea, contact me.  This is plan B, and I’m ready to work just as hard on it as I did on plan A.

Fuck democracy.

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